Notice: Home alone tonight?
Topic: The best suicide method!
+Anonymous A — 3.3 years ago #62,435
If I killed myself, this is how I’d do it. You got to do it right. I’d get a job fixing people’s computers. Like at Geek Squad or something like that. I’d go over to someone’s house when we get a call. I’d get on their computer, take a look a bit, and then say “excuse me ma’am, can I use your bathroom real quick?” So I’d get in the bathroom, lock the door, shit and piss over everything, stab myself in the legs and wrists so there’s blood everywhere, and then shoot myself. The stabbing part is important because if you just shoot yourself in the head it might not empty out all the blood and you want as big of a mess as possible. So some time would pass, and she’d start wondering why you’re in the bathroom so long. But think about it. You don’t want to interrupt someone in the bathroom right? It’s weird. But then half an hour goes by, an hour, two hours, and you’re still in the bathroom and the door is locked and you’re not working on their computer like they expect. So I don’t know what happens later or if/when they kick down the door or pick the lock or something, but once they get inside, they find your shit, piss and blood everywhere and a dead body LOL! They make a call to get their computer fixed and get this instead. There’s no amount of therapy in the world that can fix that psychological damage when they open the door.
+Anonymous B — 3.3 years ago, 5 minutes later[T] [B] #630,964
@OP
> If I killed myself, this is how I’d do it. You got to do it right. I’d get a job fixing people’s computers. Like at Geek Squad or something like that. I’d go over to someone’s house when we get a call. I’d get on their computer, take a look a bit, and then say “excuse me ma’am, can I use your bathroom real quick?” So I’d get in the bathroom, lock the door, shit and piss over everything, stab myself in the legs and wrists so there’s blood everywhere, and then shoot myself. The stabbing part is important because if you just shoot yourself in the head it might not empty out all the blood and you want as big of a mess as possible. So some time would pass, and she’d start wondering why you’re in the bathroom so long. But think about it. You don’t want to interrupt someone in the bathroom right? It’s weird. But then half an hour goes by, an hour, two hours, and you’re still in the bathroom and the door is locked and you’re not working on their computer like they expect. So I don’t know what happens later or if/when they kick down the door or pick the lock or something, but once they get inside, they find your shit, piss and blood everywhere and a dead body LOL! They make a call to get their computer fixed and get this instead. There’s no amount of therapy in the world that can fix that psychological damage when they open the door.
tl;dr
+Anonymous C — 3.3 years ago, 1 day later, 1 day after the original post[T] [B] #630,976
Hi
+Anonymous D — 3.3 years ago, 8 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[T] [B] #630,977
Anti-choline toxicity and an exit bag. Thanks.
·Anonymous A (OP) — 3.3 years ago, 1 hour later, 1 day after the original post[T] [B] #630,978
dude the point isn't to go peacefully, the point is to be an epic troll. Imagine you're some housewife who wants to get her computer fixed, and instead she gets a corpse of a dude who shat all over everything before he offed himself! Lmao!
+Anonymous E — 3.3 years ago, 2 hours later, 1 day after the original post[T] [B] #630,982
You sound like a relative of the greatest shock poster ever... PINWORM!
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