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Topic: im absolutely obsessed with bert
+Anonymous A — 4.7 years ago #60,377
i think about him all the time and even dream about him occasionally. sometimes i fantasize about the two of us owning the libs together on Tucker and doing Bob Hope style comedy for our boys serving overseas. sometimes i hear something funny and i swear i can almost hear Berts reaction in my head then I chuckle to myself cause hes a real hoot! every night when I come home from work I make dinner while I watch Curb Your Enthusiasm, According To Jim, or The King of Queens. while im cooking i like to pretend that Bert is in the recliner watching with me and we laugh at the jokes and talk about our day. sometimes i forget about Bert for an hour or two but i always end up seeing or hearing something that reminds me of him!
+Anonymous B — 4.7 years ago, 3 hours later[T] [B] #616,470
Is that you, Tripgrrl?
+Anonymous C — 4.7 years ago, 2 hours later, 6 hours after the original post[T] [B] #616,471
@previous (B)
No it isn't, sweetie.
·Anonymous A (OP) — 4.7 years ago, 14 hours later, 21 hours after the original post[T] [B] #616,531
another one of those dreams last night. this time Bert and I were on an African safari adventure. Our guide, Joobalu was eaten by a lion leaving Bert and I to fend for ourselves in the wilderness. We set up a Swiss Family Robinson camp and genuinely enjoyed our time together. We were actually bummed when governor DeSantis had us flown out via helicopter!
+Anonymous D — 4.7 years ago, 2 days later, 3 days after the original post[T] [B] #616,747
Those troops would laugh the fuck off at your retardness.
+Anonymous E — 4.7 years ago, 17 minutes later, 3 days after the original post[T] [B] #616,748
Oh, hi Matt. Still crying like a bitch and refusing to return to MC?
·Anonymous A (OP) — 4.7 years ago, 1 day later, 4 days after the original post[T] [B] #616,856
more Bert time last night. It was a real whirlwind of emotion as he and I were abducted by Ducky’s pimp and left duck taped to one another in a damp basement for days. we piss and shit all over ourselves and prayed to God (the Christian one) to save us. don’t remember how it ended because I woke up when my downstairs neighbor started beating his drunk ass wife.
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