Topic: I want a laptop incapable of accessing the internet
+Anonymous A — 8.1 years ago #50,932
All I need is for it to run OpenOffice. No USBs or easy way to enable internet access would be ideal. I'd like to avoid building one and would prefer an off-the-shelf solution. So far, my best idea is a RaspberryPi Zero but it would mean minor assembly and would be irritating on the go. I would really appreciate any thoughts. Thank you.
+Anonymous B — 8.1 years ago, 27 minutes later[T] [B] #545,608
Look at craigs list for a simple used laptop. You can open it up and cut the wires to the USB and the Cat5 connector.
That is what I would do. Truly simple. Of course make sure any internal wireless adapters are just disabled.
+Anonymous C — 8.1 years ago, 14 minutes later, 41 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #545,609
@previous (B)
Nah biy a used thinkpad and take out the wifi module. Its literally 2 cables and a couple of screws.
+Anonymous D — 8.1 years ago, 3 minutes later, 45 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #545,610
@545,608 (B)
Don't usually have to cut em anymore. As C said, WiFi modules are usually held in with nothing more than a cable and screw or two, these days.
·Anonymous B — 8.1 years ago, 3 hours later, 3 hours after the original post[T] [B] #545,615
@previous (D)
Yea but the Cat5 does not wire into the wifi module. Usually goes to the main board.
He of course need cut nothing because he can put some crazy glue or other glue into the connector.
(Edited 53 seconds later.)
+Anonymous E — 8.1 years ago, 1 hour later, 4 hours after the original post[T] [B] #545,621
@previous (B)
Does he really need to worry about accidentally plugging in a cat5 cable?
·Anonymous B — 8.1 years ago, 1 hour later, 6 hours after the original post[T] [B] #545,625
@previous (E)
> incapable of accessing the internet
Just going along with what he said.
·Anonymous D — 8.1 years ago, 26 minutes later, 6 hours after the original post[T] [B] #545,626
You would have to figure out how to sever the connection between the motherboard and Ethernet port, as ethernet is usually hard-wired to the motherboard.
·Anonymous B — 8.1 years ago, 59 minutes later, 7 hours after the original post[T] [B] #545,630
@previous (D)
Yes I said that. Then later said why not just plug up the port with glue. Epoxy becomes a brick wall.
·Anonymous E — 8.1 years ago, 2 hours later, 10 hours after the original post[T] [B] #545,634
@545,625 (B)
Unless he's dumb enough to plug the cat5 cable into the computer he doesn't want connecting to the internet (in which case he deserves whatever happens when it does connect) then it
is incapable of connecting once the wifi has been disabled.
+Anonymous F — 8.1 years ago, 16 hours later, 1 day after the original post[T] [B] #545,648
Just fill up the ports with cum, and cum all over the wifi too. good to go. If you don't want unauthorized users using your laptop, just cum on the keyboard and screen. Tried and true method.
+Anonymous G — 8.1 years ago, 9 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[T] [B] #545,650
Some scissors will do.
·Anonymous D — 8.1 years ago, 1 minute later, 1 day after the original post[T] [B] #545,652
What kind of documents are you going to create using this laptop?
+Anonymous H — 8.1 years ago, 2 hours later, 1 day after the original post[T] [B] #545,653
but why
+On !Uvm54ORbmo — 8.1 years ago, 2 minutes later, 1 day after the original post[T] [B] #545,654
have you ever consider a type writer?
+Anonymous J — 8.1 years ago, 3 days later, 4 days after the original post[T] [B] #545,871
Just take the WiFi card out of a regular laptop
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