Notice: Home alone tonight?
Topic: Salt and vinegar chips/crisps
+Anonymous A — 13 years ago #26,735
I have not had any in a long time but every time I eat them I put them in my mouth and inhale deeply until the vinegar sears my lungs.
+Anti — 13 years ago, 17 minutes later[T] [B] #314,615
Upgrade to huffing vinegar... then maybe petrol... then perhaps you could try domestos enemas.
·Anonymous A (OP) — 13 years ago, 6 minutes later, 23 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #314,626
·Anti — 13 years ago, 15 minutes later, 38 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #314,634
@previous (A)
I never loved you, a real man would just do it, you're a sickly parody of a man, a spineless terrestrial gastropod mollusc! I cast grains of sodium chloride in your general direction.
·Anonymous A (OP) — 13 years ago, 7 minutes later, 46 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #314,636
@previous (Anti )
On the internet no one knows you're a mollusk. Except for you.
·Anti — 13 years ago, 2 minutes later, 48 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #314,640
@previous (A)
You can change your ways... it doesn't have to end like this. We can save you from yourself.
·Anonymous A (OP) — 13 years ago, 57 seconds later, 49 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #314,641
@previous (Anti )
This ends in sex doesn't it?
·Anti — 13 years ago, 5 minutes later, 54 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #314,645
@previous (A)
I think you need to step back and see the "big picture", it doesn't end in sex, that's just a small step forwards in your transformation... really it's just a minor technicality.
·Anonymous A (OP) — 13 years ago, 7 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[T] [B] #314,646
@previous (Anti )
I just like taking a hit of salt and vinegar chips before I eat them. I didn't realize that this would lead to a complete transformation.
·Anti — 13 years ago, 31 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[T] [B] #314,658
@previous (A)
Not many people do. Which is more reason for you to sign up for the cognitive re-assignment procedure. It's
perfectly relatively safe! I think you'll be very v. pleased with the result, friend. :)
What's the worst that could happen?
I'll go ahead and sign you up. We can get started Friday. Take these next few days to say your goodbyes to your family and friends. The less information you give them the better. Really a nice note left for them is generally the best move as this part of the transistion can be... messy.
Well we're looking forward to having you on board!
You'll need at least 4 changes of clothes + 8 pairs of socks. Foodstuff is not allowed. Drugs vary on a case to case basis. Reading material is usually okay unless its propaganda produced by our enemies. You may bring a notepad and pencils/pens. No electronics are allowed. Weapons may be brought but will be checked in and locked up in the armory upon arrival. As you may already know a blood test is required before you enlist, if you test positive for STDs you may still join but will work in a very different capacity and will not be allowed to take part in "bonding ceremonies". Well that's enough for now. We'll be in touch!
Looking forwards to having you! Sic semper tyrannis!
·Anonymous A (OP) — 13 years ago, 10 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[T] [B] #314,661
@previous (Anti )
I am going to need to consult my lawyer on this. But given that there is a sale on velour tracksuits today I do not think I will be able to see him. I will get back to you on this.
·Anti — 13 years ago, 1 hour later, 3 hours after the original post[T] [B] #314,682
@previous (A)
I'll give you 12 hours. Due to circumstances outside of my control... time is a luxury we do not have. ;|
·Anonymous A (OP) — 13 years ago, 16 minutes later, 3 hours after the original post[T] [B] #314,685
@previous (Anti )
I'm on an insulin pump except instead of insulin it's mescaline. Is this a problem problem?
·Anti — 13 years ago, 26 minutes later, 4 hours after the original post[T] [B] #314,688
@previous (A)
It really depends on what capacity you wish to assist the movement but generally speaking, no. If you desire to become a martyr for the greater good it's still possible bit may require a few minor adjustments. <3
+Anonymous C — 13 years ago, 3 hours later, 7 hours after the original post[T] [B] #314,783
@OP
You're a goddamned troll if you're eating anything but Cape Cod kettle-cooked Sea Salt & Vinegar.
·Anonymous A (OP) — 13 years ago, 2 minutes later, 7 hours after the original post[T] [B] #314,784
@previous (C)
Kettle cooked chips are the work of the Jew. They stab the roof of your mouth and perforate your bowel.
·Anonymous C — 13 years ago, 1 minute later, 7 hours after the original post[T] [B] #314,786
@previous (A)
The roof of your mouth sounds like a pussy.
·Anonymous A (OP) — 13 years ago, 27 minutes later, 7 hours after the original post[T] [B] #314,800
@previous (C)
I had a skin graft from Maggie Thatcher's box. I had to pay extra but it feels so smooth when I run my tongue across it.
Start a new topic to continue this conversation.
Or browse the latest topics.