Topic: I have never masturbated in my life

+Anonymous A — 13.5 years ago #20,400

I'm a male and yes, I'm telling the truth. I have never explored my body.

(Edited 1 minute later.)

+Anonymous B — 13.5 years ago, 4 minutes later[T] [B] #247,946

Not even a wet dream?

·Anonymous A (OP) — 13.5 years ago, 1 minute later, 6 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #247,947

@previous (B)
What's that?

·Anonymous B — 13.5 years ago, 27 seconds later, 6 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #247,948

@previous (A)
When you jizz your pants in your sleep.

·Anonymous A (OP) — 13.5 years ago, 1 minute later, 8 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #247,949

@previous (B)
I'm not sure how my jizz looks like anyway.

+Anonymous C — 13.5 years ago, 33 seconds later, 8 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #247,950

Kill yourself, worthless piece of shit.

·Anonymous B — 13.5 years ago, 1 minute later, 10 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #247,954

@247,949 (A)
It looks like ketchup. You should try it. Just get some sand paper and start wailing on your junk.

·Anonymous A (OP) — 13.5 years ago, 1 minute later, 11 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #247,958

@previous (B)
"Wailing on my junk"?

·Anonymous B — 13.5 years ago, 38 seconds later, 11 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #247,960

@previous (A)
Yeah. For better results, take a hammer and start smashing your dick with it.

·Anonymous A (OP) — 13.5 years ago, 2 minutes later, 14 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #247,963

@previous (B)
Okay now you are being silly, lol.

·Anonymous B — 13.5 years ago, 37 seconds later, 14 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #247,964

@previous (A)
I'm serious. When you see red coming out, that's how you know it's jizz.

·Anonymous A (OP) — 13.5 years ago, 4 minutes later, 18 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #247,973

@previous (B)
Why does wikipedia say otherwise?

·Anonymous B — 13.5 years ago, 1 minute later, 20 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #247,980

@previous (A)
Because they are a fraud/scam/troll Web site set up and operated by a bunch of malicious psychos. Only trust TinyChan to deliver the actual facts.

+Anonymous D — 13.5 years ago, 23 minutes later, 44 minutes after the original post[T] [B] #247,996

I have never masturbated once in my life. Although I do touch myself at night, I only scratch my balls or my hairy crouch. While many 4channers masturbate once they see a beautiful woman and subsequently their dicks become hard, I have the same feeling, but I never acted on the urge to do it. Even if I see a naked female in /s/ or a hot animu chick I didn't masturbate to it. I had downloaded many pictures of sexy women, female anime characters, and female cosplayers, and a few naked females on 4chan. When I look at them, I had many erections, and an urge to masturbate to the but I never acted on it.

But the more I don't start do it, I'm merely delaying the inevitable.

So starting from today whenever I see a picture on 4chan and if my dick gets hard, I'll get one of my three condoms, put that condom on that erect penis and start masturbating at that mage. It's a start, and since I'm going to be celibate for a long time, I might as well relive any sexual frustration I have built up since birth.

+Anonymous E — 13.5 years ago, 55 minutes later, 1 hour after the original post[T] [B] #248,036

@previous (D)
ask ducky for advice.

+Bill Cosby — 13.5 years ago, 32 minutes later, 2 hours after the original post[T] [B] #248,052

@OP

Dear ducky's beta boyfriend,

I apologize for the lateness of this reply, but due to my schedule on The Bill Cosby Show and off, I’m behind on my mail. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me. They were read with appreciation. Thank you for your lies about never masturbating. They were read with interest. You masturbate to CP.

I hope you continue to watch and enjoy the show.

Sincerely, Bill Cosby

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