TinyChan

I used to drink heavily, get thrown out of clubs and walk around to little pubs to continue drinking.

It lead to a fair number of stories but this might be the earliest.

I had been thrown out a club and two big fat guys were walking along in football shirts.
The fatter one was a cyborg; he had a broken arm or something but instead of a cast on his arm he had two metal bars.
One bar along his forearm, the other along his upper arm and they were connected via a circular hinge so he could only move his arm like a robot in one direction.
( imagine the picture going all the way up an arm )

I asked him about his cyborg arm and he laughed so we went to drink in a dirty pub where they kept hitting on the bar women.

I was sobering up at this point and I had no money so watching them hit on this goth bargirl was awkward. So I walked off and I didn't know where I was. I saw a dude and I asked him the way to my street; he said he'd take me there.

I then realised he was a hobo. But we get to the highstreet and I see the two fatsos again. They keep saying things to me I don't understand in their accent.

The hobo says to them "stop talking to him he dont understand you idiots" and the fatsos got angry at this fact. So they started a fight with the hobo while I was standing between them.

I felt sorry for the hobo getting 2 on 1 so I pushed the normal fatso into the cyborg fatso and they fell over; the hobo and I started running away. Then the hobo turned to go and get back into the fight ... I said fuck it and ran away.

I called the cops; I don't know what happened but I didn't fancy the hobo's chance.

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@OP

Have you ever ralphed on somebody?

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@previous (B)
On someones shoes.
And once when throwing up into a bucket while sitting on a chair some vomit bounced off the rim and splattered multiple people.

(Edited 12 seconds later.)

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